Contemplating Childlessness and Repercussions of Lootings in Philadelphia

Ever thought about the idea of not having children? Some consider it selfish while others see it as a personal choice. I'm Brooke, and in this captivating discussion, I lay bare my thoughts on this subject, weighing it from various perspectives, including the societal pressures, particularly on women, and the challenges that come with parenthood. In the same breath, I touch on a heartbreaking issue that’s been plaguing our city - the looting in Philadelphia. I voice out my frustration towards those who exploit peaceful protests as a smokescreen for their criminal activities, damaging local businesses and impacting our community adversely.

Allow me to take you on a deeper journey into the factors that may influence the decision to forego parenthood. From the pain and physical changes of childbirth to the financial implications, and even the freedom you might have to sacrifice, the decision is far from simple. Couple these considerations with my reflections on instances where parents have shirked their responsibilities, leaving a trail of consequences in their wake. This goes beyond just a dialogue - it's a frank and engaging discussion that provokes thought and encourages a new perspective. Join me, let's explore these issues.

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Chapters

• 0:00 Intro
• 1:08 Welcome & Episode Topic
• 2:14 Recent Looting In Philadelphia
• 9:40 Is it selfish to be child free?
• 18:38 Closing Thoughts & Outro

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Hello you guys, my name is Brooke and welcome to my podcast. Blogger with a twist. So I know what you guys may be thinking what are you going to be talking about on your podcast? So on my podcast you guys can find a range of topics about lifestyle, maybe some rants or even story times about my life or whatever. So if that sounds interesting, then definitely do not forget to subscribe. Tell your family, to your friends, to your mama, to your grandma, about my podcast and, last but not least, sit back, relax, get your snacks, your pizza, whatever you like to eat, and let's get this episode hopin. Hey, you guys, and it's your girl, brooke, and welcome back to another episode and hopefully you guys out there doing good.

Speaker 1: 1:09

So basically, for today's episode, I wanted to come on and give my opinion on a question of is it selfish if you decide not to have children? And I feel like this is such a biased topic and I think, unfortunately, women get the most scrutiny if they decide to not have children, because biologically, we have the reproductive organs to carry a child. So it's kind of like why are you denying yourself this blessing from God? But yeah, I just wanted to kind of give my thoughts on that, especially coming from someone that has never really had a strong inkling for even wanting to have children. But first, before I get started in this episode, I wanted to say something really quickly about the latest looting that has happened in Philadelphia. When I tell you, guys, I'm just so sick and tired of people trying to use a peaceful protest as a disguise, just to still the fact that most of these people were stealing things that really did not make any sense, it, just it made me realize most of y'all are y'all not really thinking about the whole circumference of the situation? Because in one clip it was a bunch of kids trying to loot a Popeyes and in my head I'm thinking how much of a bum can you be to really try to loot a Popeyes? You try and tell me you cannot afford to pay for some chicken or not even that. It's just the fact that a lot of these young people are just so ignorant that they don't care about hurting nobody else or hurting nobody else in their communities.

Speaker 1: 3:16

So it was that clip. And then there was another clip of people stealing iPhones from the Apple store and iPads, and I guess Apple put out like this siren to lock all the, to lock all of the devices that people stole. And then there was another clip of people trying to destroy the iPhones and iPads that they stole. And in my head I'm thinking this is what y'all get, because why does y'all think y'all is gonna steal something from Apple and think that it was not gonna be any consequences? And pretty much y'all wasted your time trying to steal these Apple products because y'all cannot even use them. And then some people was looting from Lulu lemon, and I'm pretty sure most of them don't even shop at Lulu lemon. It's just crazy.

Speaker 1: 4:12

I just feel like Philadelphia has just been getting worse and worse and something really needs to change and these young people need to get a grip on reality and understand that the things that they do have consequences, especially the one girl meatball that was live streaming a whole looting. I'm just thinking how stupid can you be? Why in the world would you live stream a crime happening? And then you're like antagonizing the whole thing. And then you want to be surprised when you get pulled over by the cops and be crying in your mug shot. And then now you want to be like, oh well, I'm sorry you. You know you should not be out here stealing, and that's the thing that really kills me is that people are never sorry until they get caught.

Speaker 1: 5:08

And I can just tell you guys from my own personal experience in my episode where I talked about how I got in trouble for shoplifting at 15 years old. It wasn't until I got caught that I got scared because I knew that I was in some deep trouble, and I learned a very valuable lesson from that and I am so grateful to this day that God stopped me from going down the path of destruction or maybe ending up somewhere in prison and you know, just not a good life. And so with this young woman that got charged meatball with like 21 felonies no, six felonies if she wants to get a job later on in life is not going to be that easy. Even with the other kids and young people that are getting charged with felonies, I guess in my mind I don't understand why you would make your life so difficult and the fact that this generation of young people, they have no fear of the law, they don't care if they go to jail, they don't care, they just don't care. And I guess that's just scary to me, because what is it going to take for y'all to wake up and get yourselves on the right track. But anyway, um, I just think it's a shame.

Speaker 1: 6:33

And then now they didn't close all of the wine and spirits in Philadelphia, and I'm a little upset. And it's not like I'm alcoholic and I drink alcohol every week, but if I want to get a bottle of roe scato or mo scato, now I gotta drive over the bridge to Delaware to get my liquor because dumb behinds want to come out here and trash the city and make it worse for everybody else. And then I had also saw a clip of a couple of young people breaking into a pharmacy and stealing some medication. I believe they stole about 40 prescriptions worth of high blood pressure medication and HIV medication. And this is my thing. Why are you tearing up your own community? You have people that depend on these local pharmacies to get their medication.

Speaker 1: 7:32

And now, because you want to be stupid and not think about the whole situation and the circumference, now everybody in your community has to suffer because of your actions, and that's my whole thing. You're not making a change or anything like that. By destroying your own community, you're only hurting your community, and that's why I feel like when people say black lives matter. I just feel like it's kind of wishy-washy, because if it's black on white crime, it's like black lives matter, but when it's black on black crimes or black people destroying other black businesses in their own community, what do we have to say about that? I just hate that. You have people that do stuff like this and it pings this narrative of all black people are like that and it's not the case. And I know there are going to be some black people that may say, oh, I don't care what white people have to say about me, but you know, just take that out the equation and just ask yourself is this a type of example that you want to set for yourself? Anyway, yeah, I just like I said, I just wanted to get that off my chest because I just feel like this looting has become repetitive and y'all people that's doing this looting, y'all obviously cannot think of nothing else creative or something that's positive. But anyway, like I said, today's episode I'll be talking about my thoughts on the question of is it selfish if you decide not to have children? So, if you guys want to know more, you know the drill get your little snackies, popcorn, whatever you like to eat, and let's get this episode popping.

Speaker 1: 9:29

So, like I told you guys, as far as me, I've always been on the fence about having kids, and I think that's because of a couple of things. Number one I have a low tolerance for pain and I know every woman's pregnancy story is different, but I feel like when it comes to the pain of delivery, I feel like it kind of goes the same across all boards. So I just don't want to deal with that. And then I've heard that contractions are like 10 times worse than menstrual cramps, and it's bad enough, my cramps already be kicking my behind, but having to deal with contractions. And then I know some women get epidural and let me tell you I do not like needles. Okay, so I could not imagine having to get an epidural and having to get a needle stuck on my back. But you know it just, it just scares me, I guess, going through labor, because I feel like up into the labor part, I think I would be fine, but going into labor, that's the part that really just terrifies me, because I just like I don't know if I want to put my body through that.

Speaker 1: 10:51

Secondly is the cost of having a child. I remember I think it was a couple of weeks ago I was on YouTube and I was watching a video of this girl comparing how much it is to have a baby in the United States versus in Korea. And when I tell you it's so much cheaper to have a baby in Korea than in the United States. And then on top of that, I think I have seen another well, I don't think. On top of that, I have seen another video about just the aftercare after a woman has a baby. And they have this thing in Korea where the woman is allowed to, you know, rest and heal while somebody else takes care of the baby. And I'm just saying to myself, in America, after a woman has the baby, more than likely her job wants her back in the office in less than two months. But in Korea you have a whole little aftercare plan for the mother. And I mean, why can't we not have that in America? I don't understand that. So, yeah, it's just the cost of having a baby scares me. And then on top of the cost of living in America, that's like double. So those factors, I'm just kind of like I don't know. That's a lot of money, you know.

Speaker 1: 12:27

And then the next reason is I enjoy my freedom. So I think what some people don't understand about having children is that when you have kids, you are sacrificing a part of your freedom. What I mean by that is if you are used to going out every weekend and partying and hanging out with your friends, when you have children, that routine has to change. You know, you got some people that feel like, oh, I can still go out and party and do all of this, but in all honesty, you can't do all of that and still expect to raise your child. That's just my personal opinion.

Speaker 1: 13:12

I just think some people do not want to give up their old lifestyle and for me maybe it's because I'm an only child and I've never had to share growing up, nor has my mother. My mother is also an only child. I just like not having to share, you know, and it's so crazy because my boyfriend, he wants kids, but he actually grew up with siblings. He has a fraternal, fraternal twin brother and he has a sister. So growing up he was used to sharing his space. But for me, I've never really had to share. So I guess the freedom part is definitely another reason why I've never really wanted to have kids, because even though people say, oh, having children are a blessing, they also can be very expensive. Okay, let's not leave that out of the picture. Okay, and so, when it boils down to me, I feel like if you decide to not have children, it does not mean that you're being selfish. It could be reasons why you may not want to have kids.

Speaker 1: 14:29

I just don't understand why you have some people that feel like, if somebody does not want to have a child, that they're doing some type of disservice to the human race. Because, let me tell you, there are plenty of people in this world that have children or has had children, and they have not been the best parents and it makes you wonder why was this person allowed to procreate and have children? Like, seriously, I've read so many stories of parents physically or verbally abusing their children and I'm just thinking this is why not having children is not selfish, okay, because when it comes to being a parent, it takes a lot of responsibility, because you are responsible for another human life and you have to understand that it comes with sacrifices. It comes with a lot of strength, because you know my mom. She is, you know she's a single parent, she raised me by herself and I definitely commend my mom and other parents, not just women, but just other single parents that take on a week of raising a child or even more than one child by themselves. You know it's a lot to deal with, and so I guess, for me it just kind of makes me upset when I see stories about people or well, about parents basically Abandoning their responsibilities.

Speaker 1: 16:13

I think I mentioned in a previous episode about the one girl that was arguing with her Baby daddy, her boyfriend, and she basically told him the only reason why she had their daughter is because of him, not because she wanted to be a mother, but solely because of him. And then there was another clip that I saw, and this young lady I believe I don't know how many kids she has, but I know she has more than one and so this woman has the audacity to drive to her mom's house without any notice and Dropped off her kids to her mom and basically tries to tell her mom that, look, I don't want to take care of the kids. No more, you can take care of them, because apparently her new man Did not like kids. And this is my whole thing. Why are you letting a man define your parenting? Why would you let a man Stop you from being the best mom that you can be, and to me that is selfish. The fact that you are choosing a man over your children and the fact that the other girl only had this child just for her boyfriend, that is selfish, because you knew from the rip that you did not want to have kids. Now, come on now and, like I said before, you know it is sad because it's always the children that have to suffer and end. So, yes, like I said, when it comes to that question, I do not think it's selfish.

Speaker 1: 17:43

I think everybody has the right to choose what they want to do with their body, especially women. And you know, sometimes, depending on your lifestyle, maybe kids are not the best thing. So I think it really depends on the person. Another thing I wanted to point out really quickly is when people say, oh, what about when you get older? Who's gonna take care of you? Well, I mean, if you got a partner, they can, but, god forbid, your partner dies before you, you know, then you're basically by yourself, unless you have a really good Family support system. It really, like I said, depends on the person.

Speaker 1: 18:27

So I just wanted to close out and say that if you are a woman, you're kind of like in this limbo about if you want to have kids or not have kids. Really sit down and think about how having kids would impact your life and also Make sure that the decision you are making is for yourself and not because of what other people are telling you. And even for guys, like I said, I feel like guys do not get as much scrutiny if they don't want to have kids. But I definitely feel like if a guy does not want to have kids, you have some people that think, oh, he's probably gay. And it's just like if a guy does not want to have kids, that does not necessarily mean that he's gay. Okay, he just don't want to have no kids and it's nothing wrong with that. At the end of the day, it's nothing wrong if you decide to be child-free. We need to start normalizing that. People are going to have different lifestyles and we may not agree on every lifestyle that somebody has, but it is their choice and we need to respect it.

Speaker 1: 19:35

And so, yeah, you guys um, if you all enjoyed this episode, definitely feel free to share it and, like I always say, if you have any questions, be sure to send me an email also, I believe in. Like my last two episodes, I told you guys about my new Facebook page for my merch. I recently deleted that page because I also have my main Facebook page and I just felt like I do not have the time to be Managing two Facebook pages. So if you guys Want to contact me about my merch, just check out my Facebook page, which is Facebook comm slash Philly blogger. The link is in the link is in the description. So, other than that, you all have a great day, a great weekend and until my next episode, peace.